Death, Devotion, Dissonance

Another week passed by, and half of Evin\'s two-month-long holiday was finished. He was now slowly making his way through the city streets, feeling quite good with his progress. Today was the first day he hadn\'t felt any phantom pains from his metal leg, and was also his first day going outside without Bella or Leanne accompanying him. The weather was also great, with white clouds covering the sky, making it not too hot, nor too cold.

Feeling adventurous, he even put his prosthetic on the ground, curious to see whether it could take a bit of his weight. He nearly toppled over due to the act, garnering the attention of passerby pedestrians. One woman immediately dove towards him, trying to catch him, but Evin forced his hands to put his crutch in front of him so he didn\'t fall completely. 

"Are you alright? Do you need help to go back home?" but the woman still came over to support him. 

"I\'m fine. Thank you for your kind intentions. Just a bad step is all," Evin replied, trying his best to keep the hostility away from his voice.

The woman, like many others before her, was quite adamant on helping Evin out, making him wonder if these people ever had anything better to do. But after a minute, Evin finally managed to get rid of her.

Evin knew these people just wanted to help him, but the way they unhesitatingly grabbed at his body whenever something wrong happened to him irked him to no end. 

\'At least ask for my permission before you touch me,\' he thought with a sigh.

\'I feel bad for blind people, being touched by others all the time… Even if others are trying to help them. How disturbing and anxiety-inducing would it feel for them to have a stranger\'s hand touch them without even seeing it coming?\'

Sighing, Evin walked on, though this time he was careful not to let his metal feet touch anything. He told himself that the time would come, that he would eventually walk on his own two legs. Like Lord Armut warned him, he shouldn\'t hurry for results. 

A few minutes later, Evin found himself at the edge of the area reserved for 1st grade citizens. Usually, he would head back around here, but since he wasn\'t feeling that tired, he decided to go a bit further, to walk around the area that he once grew up in. 

The difference between the two areas wasn\'t so stark near the border, but the area for 2nd grades definitely was gloomier. The bland colored clothing of the people, the messily hand-built buildings and roads, the occasional stench of garbage and alcohol that invaded Evin\'s nostrils…

\'To think the living area for 3rd grades is even worse than this…\' Evin thought with a sigh.

\'To think I lived here for 10 years, but now I feel like I can\'t stay here for more than a day… I guess people do change their ways very quickly.\'

"Hey, isn\'t that Evin?" 

Evin turned his head towards the voice, to see a familiar face smiling towards him. There were a few other teens near him, one of them holding a few bottles of wine. 

\'Who\'s that again?\' Evin thought briefly, before the relevant memories came to his mind.

"Hey, Baker," Evin replied.

Baker was one of the more popular teens around this area, mostly because his father worked a bakery and made some pretty tasty cookies, the leftovers of which Baker would share with others if it didn\'t sell so well for the day. Evin didn\'t know why a baker would name his own son Baker, but seemed to be a good conversation starter for the boy.

"Wow, I\'m surprised you remember my name," Baker replied with a bright smile. Evin thought he was being sarcastic, but the boy seemed genuinely pleased. "We were just about to go drink a few bottles; do you want to come with us?"

Evin didn\'t really want to, but feeling curious about what they wanted, he found himself nodding.

The group made their way towards a small, relatively clean alleyway, which was, for some reason, filled with various vegetables growing on the walls and the ground. Evin used to frequent this area a lot, as it was close to his house and was mostly crowd free, due to the overgrown plants. 

"It\'s been so long since we\'ve seen you around here." Baker began, as he handed Evin a cup of wine. "How have you been? I\'ve heard the area for 1st grades is damn bloody pretty. I glanced at it when it was my turn at the Awakening Ceremony, but too bad I didn\'t turn out to be a mage."

"It is really pretty. But sometimes, you visit the areas reserved for nobles, and you realize there\'s always something prettier than what you know," Evin replied.

"Really? Like what?"

"I guess a duke\'s palace would come next, then the king\'s," Evin replied. "Oh, but I guess the Empress\'s Tower would trump over all of them."

"The Black Tower?" 

"Yep."

"Must be damn bloody majestic," one of the boys nearby said.

\'Damn bloody… must be some new way 2nd grade teens speak. I definitely didn\'t hear anyone in the 1st grade area saying these words. Sigh, everyone should just stick to the Empress\'s tits, ass and occasional grace if they want to curse. It\'s the classics.\'

"So anyway, how about you?" Baker continued, glancing at Evin\'s leg. "How\'s life in the Academy?"

Evin wanted to tease the answer for a bit longer, but he decided against it. 

"For me… I\'m currently enjoying my holidays. As for life in the Academy, well, we study stuff. Magical and non-magical both, and after a while, the teachers throw us into pits of mana-beasts and criminals, so we can learn to fight better."

"Really?" Baker asked.

"Yep. It\'s a terrible thing. Well, it\'s not that bad if you\'re good at fighting… but if you\'re shit like me, it\'s not weird to lose a leg or a hand," Evin replied, not really sure why he was making up this lie. 

"That can\'t be right?"

"Do you think I cut my leg off so I can replace it with a metal one?"

"Well, no, but… criminals? Real people?" Baker asked again, disbelief filling his voice. "How can that be?"

"Yes. The first time\'s the hardest, but they make it easier for you by drugging them beforehand. So all you have to do is stab them with something sharp, be it the weapons lying around, or something you make with magic."

"That\'s damn bloody fucked up," one said, and a deep silence filled the air.

Evin couldn\'t take it anymore, and laughed loudly to break the silence.

"Ha-ha, I\'m sorry… I was just joking."

Everyone breathed out a sigh of relief, but a girl among them was still frowning.

"Then how did you lose your leg?" she asked, staring at Evin.

"I was just unlucky. We do fight mana-beasts and some rather questionable enemies, and one of them got to me. It\'s not like you can ask them to hold back for you, and it\'s not convenient for the teachers to save you from every threat."

It was concrete enough to satisfy the surrounding teens, and was also vague enough to tickle their curiosities. 

"Cast a spell for us," one of them asked, and Evin complied. After thinking a bit, he decided that it was too hard to create something flashy, and just asked everyone around for requests. Fireballs, ice spears, gusts of wind, a few illusions… none of them were hard spells to create, but since Evin could do each and every one of their requests, the teens seemed quite impressed. They then began asking Evin various questions about his life as a mage.

Despite its hollow nature, Evin enjoyed his brief moment of popularity. He was becoming quite popular two months ago, but something told him he wouldn\'t be so easy to approach after the Academy classes resumed. Part of it would be Decatur\'s doing, while another part would be him killing Byron. 

But honestly, he didn\'t care whether he was popular or not. He would be satisfied if he was close to the people he truly wanted to be with. 

"Ah, is it raining?" someone murmured, holding their hands out. 

Evin also felt a few drops of water falling on his shoulders. It began to drizzle pretty soon.

"Seems like it\'s gonna pour," Baker said, looking towards the sky, and everyone decided to scatter for the day. Baker\'s group asked Evin if he needed help going back, but he reassured them that he wasn\'t going to get lost.

After everyone left, Evin stood in the rain for a few seconds, enjoying himself. He could\'ve created a layer of a spell to save him from getting wet, but he decided against it. He liked the rain, and it wasn\'t that hard for him to make himself dry again if he wanted to.

But the pleasant moment was interrupted when his foot started sending him vicious pulsations of pain. It was never pleasant to feel these pains, but this time, things seemed even worse than usual. He was suddenly reminded of Lord Armut\'s warnings to avoid rainy weather.

\'Shit… I should\'ve been more careful…\' Evin thought, as he crouched down in pain and stood inside a small tunnel that led the alleyway to the main street outside it.

Breathing deeply, he calmed himself down and began working on a spell. He created a hot gust of wind and used it to dry his body and his clothes. This seemed to help reduce the pain, but it still felt strong in the back of his head. 

"Of all the days for me to go waddling alone…" he murmured, before setting his crutches towards home.

\'Wait, I can just fly there… It\'s better for me to walk, but surely, it\'s stupid to torture myself like this...\'

But then, a stubborn part of his head began to show himself, demanding that he walk home. It was a stupid thing to be stubborn on, so Evin didn\'t bother with the random thought and reached out for the lodestone in his pocket. 

<It\'s a weird thing, human relationships,> words sounded inside his head. 

Evin instantly stopped whatever he was doing, and replied.

<Endra?>

The Voice stopped talking with Evin after its last argument with him. 

<It rarely goes the way one wants it to. The ones you desperately cling onto want to keep their distance from you… but the ones you want to push away cling to you like moths to a flame…Well, moths pay a painful lesson to learn that flames aren\'t something so desirable,> The Voice spoke slowly, almost reminding Evin of the Type 12. 

<What are you talking about?> Evin asked, and felt that it became hard to breathe.

<I\'m sorry for what I\'m about to put you through.>

As Evin struggled to understand its words, he heard the faint sounds of footsteps behind him, and then felt something hard hit his head. He struggled to keep his consciousness, and to absorb the mana inside the lodestones to strengthen himself, but the strength in his arms failed him.

Evin then found it terribly hard to breathe, his eyesight spinning, before being engulfed by darkness.

…